I murdered a ninja because the voices told me to

Published in September 20th, 2008
Posted by witchblade32 in Chain Letters
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Put the phrases together, type the phrase in the subject box, pass it on to your friends!!

Pick the month you were born in:

January - I kicked
February - I loved
March - I did the Macarena with
April - I played with
may - I spit on
June - I murdered
July - I sang to
August - I had lunch with
September - I danced with
October - I smoked
November - I yelled at
December - I ran over

Pick the day you were born:
1 - a paperclip
2- a monster
3 - a phone
4 - a fork
5 - a gangster
6 - a mexican
7 - my cell phone
8 - my dog
9- my best friend’s boyfriend
10 - my neighbor
11 - an iPod
12 - a banana
13 - Chuck Norris
14 - a stuffed animal
15 - a goat
16 - a pickle
17 - your mom
18 - a spoon
19 - myself
20 - a football player
21 - a ninja
22 - a fireman
23 - a noodle
24 - a squirrel
25 - a baseball hat
26 - my sister
27 - my brother
28 - my science teacher
29 - a permanent marker
30 - a llama
31 - a homeless guy

Pick the color of shirt you are wearing:
White - because I was high
Black - because that’s how I roll
pink - Because I have issues
red - because the voices told me to
blue - because I’m sexy and do what i want to
green - because I hate myself
purple - because I’m cool
gray - because I was drunk
yellow - because someone offered me 1,000,000 dollars
orange - because I hate my family
Other - because I’m mental
none - because I can’t control myself

Don’t forget to send this to all your friends

Priceless

Published in September 7th, 2008
Posted by witchblade32 in Grownup Humor
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Telling Husband you’re going out for the night with the ‘Girls’… $0.00
Red Leather Jacket for night out with the ‘Girls’… $200.00
Car wash and Wax… $20.00
Getting a Radar photo speeding ticket while out with the ‘Girls’. $150.00

(click below for photo and more :) )

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Blonde joke

Published in August 27th, 2008
Posted by witchblade32 in Random Stuff
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A blonde wanted to go ice fishing. She’d seen many books on the subject, And finally getting all the necessary tools together, she made for the ice. After positioning her comfy footstool, she started to make a circular cut in the ice. Suddenly, from the sky, a voice boomed,

“THERE ARE NO FISH UNDER THE ICE.”

Startled, the blonde moved further down the ice, poured a thermos of Cappuccino, and began to cut yet another hole. Again from the heavens
The voice bellowed,

“THERE ARE NO FISH UNDER THE ICE.”

The blonde, now worried, moved away, clear down to the opposite end of the ice. She set up her stool once more and tried again to cut her hole.

The voice came once more,

“THERE ARE NO FISH UNDER THE ICE.”

She stopped, looked skyward, and said,

“IS THAT YOU LORD?”

The voice replied,

“NO, THIS IS THE MANAGER OF THE HOCKEY RINK”

SUMMER (CAUTION)

Published in August 21st, 2008
Posted by witchblade32 in Grownup Humor
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Many of you may have used the derogatory term “dickhead” to refer to someone who may deservedly have earned such a title.  Others of you may have earned the title for yourselves.

However, it should be noted that real “dickheads” do exist in the wild, and may be spending some time this summer at a community swimming pool in your area.

Be alert and exercise necessary caution.

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